One more

Three new reviews are slated to be published today, but before that - and while you're waiting - you might want to take a look at VGArchive's new updates.

The dragon lies slain...

I haven't had the best of luck lately. Just yesterday I was celebrating over buying Blue Dragon to bring my Sakaguchi collection one step closer to a full circle. Well, I started playing this morning. About ten minutes into it, and immediately feeling it - that good old sensation of a classic J-RPG - the game completely froze. I reset the game and started over, only to get the startling message "This disc is unreadable." Well, I did all the usual stuff; I wiped the disc (looked like someone wiped their ass on it, by the way), let the 360 cool down for a while before restarting the console, and I even tried the old Final Fantasy trick and tried to load the game from another disc. Well, Disc 2 was ALL banged up, even the print on the disc face had worn out some. Disc 3 was OK, and it loaded the game up just fine, but when it came time to insert Disc 1, I was back at the dashboard, getting the same "fuck you" treatment from the 'box. Well, after confirming that the console was fine, and other games worked fine, I marched back to GameStop.

This is where it got interesting. I already knew the sad fact that they didn't have another copy of Blue Dragon in store; like I said, the game is hard to come by. Well, the clerk asked me if I wanted my money back, or use the defective game as an incentive to buy some other game. I couldn't resist the latter option, I had my mind set on a sleeper RPG. He figured that I must know my RPG's, so he listed quite a few items I might be interested in, and which were priced about the same as Blue Dragon; Tales of Vesperia, Infinite Undiscovery, The Last Remnant, and finally, Star Ocean: The Last Hope. Finally, he said that I could get a Limited Collector's Edition of the last game mentioned at the same price as a standard edition. I started thinking about Star Ocean: Till the End of Time, which I used to own on the PlayStation 2 (for some reason, I forgot to mention it in the "lost" part of my collection last year), and recounting why I quit playing the game, although I liked it quite a bit. I couldn't come up with a good reason; it was a big game, it looked fantastic... the combat system was a bit quirky, but I remember getting used to it. Also, that offer for the Collector's Edition sounded too great to pass up, so I replaced Blue Dragon with this:

So, before tomorrow's updates, I'm going to take a swim in Star Ocean, for the first time in about five years. I'm at least hoping for a game easy to drown my sorrows with.

You want to update, Snake?

It's crazy how time just flies by! It feels like it was just yesterday I wrote those Track & Field reviews and the Castlevania DLC Guide, but apparently it's been a while. I'm very sorry, and I promise to deliver new reviews this week, as I'm currently enjoying my holiday. Actually, "enjoying" is not the proper word to describe it, as it's freakin' cold in here. This has got to be the worst summer of my life, in terms of weather at least.

Well, enough about the weather, let's take a look at what's happening in my fruitful relationship with the video game scene. First of all, I bought Blue Dragon for the Xbox 360 today. I wasn't supposed to buy any new games this month, but Blue Dragon is a Sakaguchi game, which automatically makes it a must-buy for me, it's not very easy to come by these days, and finally, it was on sale for €9.90. I spent the night at a friend's house, and took a bus home, and it stopped right in front of the mall the local GameStop is housed in. From this day forth, that bus stop shall be called "the bus stop of doom". Anyway, in its overtly anime/manga-influenced style, Blue Dragon is really not my tastiest cup of tea, but I think it will make for a very interesting review one day, considering my (cult) infatuation with Final Fantasy and the more recent Mistwalker game Lost Odyssey.

Some time ago, as prompted by the long-anticipated Trophy support patch for the first true PlayStation 3 masterpiece, I teased the thought of going back to one of my favourite video game franchises of all time - Metal Gear. I've been working on some sort of a solution to how this Metal Gear "retrospective", if you will, should go down, and it's still going to take me some time. The only thing I can state for certain is that you're going to see new reviews related to the Metal Gear franchise in the near future - I'd love to do a REAL retrospective, but I'm not sure where to start or what kind of a basic concept such retrospective should have. I'm guessing I'll get back to this. I'm currently replaying Metal Gear Solid 3, and I have at least four more games to go after that (including the newly Trophy-imbued Metal Gear Solid 4), so there will most likely be a lot of unrelated reviews in the between to fill in some gaps - one does not simply rock through Metal Gear.

What I personally consider VGArchive's most important function is nearing completion; I've finally grasped what I want the Collection to look like. I'm aiming to publish the Collection in its final basic form around the same time I publish my next reviews. I'm not nailing a date here, but from the looks of things at the moment, I dare to guess Thursday.

Finally, in a note totally unrelated to everything, I'd like you to take a peek at a band I've liked for many years, but grown to LOVE in the last few months; they've climbed my last.fm charts faster than any artist, ever. I'm listening to their whole backlog as I'm working on the Collection, and I thought to share the pleasure with you. They're called Evergrey, they're from Sweden, and they play their own, distinctive style of melancholic, progressive power metal. This is the namesake lead track from their 2006 album Monday Morning Apocalypse.

REVIEW - International Track & Field | PS1 | 1996

GENRE(S): Sports
RELEASED: June 1996
AVAILABLE ON: ARC, PS1
DEVELOPER(S): Konami
PUBLISHER(S): Konami

Track & Field was one of the few franchises originating from the 8-bit era that skipped a whole console generation. When International Track & Field was announced for the PlayStation in the wake of the Atlanta Summer Olympics in '96, eight years since the release of the previous major title in the acclaimed franchise, critics were overjoyed, but many also made note that the game would not survive if it was carved from the exact same wood as the previous games. ...Yes, it would have.

It's in your face, but you can't grab it

Discus fuckin' sucks.

I wanted this game so bad. I didn't have a PlayStation back when the game was released, but my friend had it and he called me one day to tell me that his dad had bought him the new Track & Field game. I rushed over and found out that the game he got was actually Olympic Summer Games, the official video game of Atlanta '96 which came out around the same time as International Track & Field, and it wasn't very good. My desire for International Track & Field kept on growing and the game was nowhere to be found at any right time. I finally downloaded the game 12 years later from the PlayStation Network, and was immensely disappointed.

The game looks quite all right, considering that it's a relatively early game for the original PlayStation, but the music and sound effects are absolutely horrid.

Could we just go already? Like, today?!

For years, I've been complaining about Hammer Throw in all the forms it has taken in all games it's been featured in. Not only is that event in the game, but it's accompanied by similar, and just as frustrating events in Discus and Shot Put. That's not the whole story, not by a long shot. The game utilizes a new type of button mashing system, which requires you to alternate between two dash buttons, with an occasional press of an action button. Not only is this uncomfortable, but it requires you to come up with a specific, even more uncomfortable technique for merely holding the controller.

And I thought pole vaulting in Track & Field II
was frustrating.

Even if you do come up with a technique, you have to get used to the game's idiotic ways of teasing you with the thought that you're actually doing well, when you're not even close to qualifying the current event. Javelin Throw is a good example of a deeply frustrating event; it's always been one of my favourites, but in this game, it drives me nuts. No matter if I manage to do the perfect approach, no matter if I find the perfect angle, the throw can still go both ways: just barely above qualification, or just barely below it. I swear I did two 100% identical approaches, and ended up with results that differed by ten whole meters. Doing well just once in Practice does not mean you're ready to take on the real deal, 'cause the game is a two-faced BITCH! You can't work with her at all.

Out of the 11 different events, four or five are playable. Just trying the rest is like pissing in the wind and having the piss soar back in your face. I simply don't get why this game is so acclaimed, and because it is, I wasn't sure if I should even have reviewed it, 'cause my opinion on it seems to be so different from everyone else's - International Track & Field is a worthless waste of time and money. It's frustrating and uncomfortable, and that's the bottom line.

UPS
+ It looks pretty good

DOWNS
- It sounds pretty terrible
- It's frustratingly random, which becomes most evident in the main mode in which not qualifying actually means something
- Alternating between three buttons is hard, slow, uncomfortable and even painful; they should've just stuck with the classic system, win or lose
- The opening sequences for the events last for decades

< 4.4 >

REVIEW - Track & Field II | NES | 1988

GENRE(S): Sports
RELEASED: September 1988
AVAILABLE ON: NES
DEVELOPER(S): Konami
PUBLISHER(S): Konami

Track & Field II was actually the fourth game in the Track & Field series, and it came out exclusively on the Nintendo Entertainment System in 1988. The game boasted with some of the most enhanced graphics seen at those times, and with a cavalcade of 15, somewhat unorthodox events, of which only two were part of the original arcade version of the first game. The game was one of my favourite NES games back in the day the old box was in the spotlight, but after all these years, I think it was the untypical nature of the events and the graphics that hit the right spot. I know there are people out there who consider this button mashfest a milestone in the history of sports games, and it does have its shiny spots, but in general, Track & Field II has seemingly outlived its usefulness on my account, whereas the first game still manages to satisfy every time I take it for a spin.

Harder, faster, and with deadly precision

The iconic arrival sequence.

Me and my brother rented this game for God knows how many separate times from a local video store back when it was released in Europe. Back then, it felt superior to Track & Field in Barcelona in almost every way, but like I said, it's now obvious that it was because it looked so amazing. Track & Field II is an unforgiving, uncomfortable experience. It would be quite all right if it was just one game, but it's a sequel to a great NES game, and that casts a whole different shade of light on it.

The game looks great, for the fourth and final time. The music is also quite inspirational stuff, with a genuine atmosphere. It's funny that now that the game looks and sounds better, it plays out worse. In the case of some specific events, a lot, lot worse.

Fencing. Not as tactical as it would first seem.

There are 15 different olympic events, of which one is wholly exclusive to the Versus Mode, and two of them present themselves as bonus events during the Tournament Mode: Fencing, Triple Jump, Freestyle Swimming, High Dive, Clay Pigeon Shooting, Hammer Throw, Taekwondo, Pole Vault, Canoeing, Archery, Hurdles, Horizontal Bar, Hang Gliding, Arm Wrestling and Gun Firing. Sounds odd, huh? Although the Tournament Mode comes with shotgun encouragement to go for the gold totally absent from the first game, the game is full of odd events, most of which suck ass on the top of it all.

There are surprisingly few events that consist of raping the A button, and even in those events, it's not enough: you have to MURDER it. Gaining anything near to maximum speed is almost impossible with a regular controller, or without the Speedboard (there's actually a game that makes that piece of junk useful?!), and an event like Triple Jump demands ultra-high precision with the jumps for you to just qualify that simply isn't fun anymore. Finally, the track for you to run in that specific event is way too long. Pole Vault is another nightmare of an event in the same vein.

I used to break world records at Triple Jump. Now
simply qualifying is a pain. What gives?

"What do I have to do to win?" is a question that you'll be asking yourself a lot. An optimist would say "practice". A realist like me would have to go with "beats me". But it's true, practice will help you, and luckily you'll be able to do that 'til the cows come home in Training Mode. After you've learned the basics of each event and got them hammered to the back of your skull, you're ready to take on the main mode of the game, which is the Tournament Mode... MAYBE. The events are divided so that each of the five days has a dealbreaker, be it Hammer Throw, Pole Vault or Canoeing - events in which your performance is affected by a stroke of good luck above everything else. The qualifiers are just crazy. Luckily there's a password, but only after each day of competition.

Although there's a feeling of accomplishment every time you pass a day at the races with flying colours, the game is just way too hard and strange to enjoy. It certainly left its mark on me back in the day, and I still have that mark, but I wished that a couple of decades later, it would've left a couple of new ones besides wounds. I'll always silently nod to Track & Field II as one of the best-looking 8-bit presentations, but it's not the classic game I remembered it to be.

UPS
+ It looks and sounds great
+ There are a few events from all sides of the cube I honestly enjoy
+ The feeling of accomplishment
+ The very welcome, albeit limited, password system

DOWNS
- It's strange; the choices for events are mostly very odd
- It's unforgiving; succeeding demands perfect precision and maximum speed, which is all but unobtainable
- The events are not only strange, but there are a lot of simply unplayable ones such as the age-old scourge called Hammer Throw

< 6.4 >

REVIEW - Track & Field | NES & Xbox 360 | 1987 & 2007

NES VERSIONS (1987 & 1992)

GENRE(S): Sports
RELEASED: 1983 (Arcade)
AVAILABLE ON: Apple II, ARC, Atari 2600, Atari 8-bit, C64, MSX, NES, Xbox 360, ZX Spectrum
DEVELOPER(S): Konami, Atarisoft (Apple II), General Computer Corporation (Atari 2600), Digital Eclipse Software (Xbox 360)
PUBLISHER(S): Konami, Atarisoft (Apple II, C64), Atari (Atari 2600, Atari 8-bit), Ocean Software (ZX Spectrum), Kemco (Track & Field in Barcelona)

As the 2012 Summer Olympics are coming to a close, I think the time is more than ripe to look into the mother, father, aunt and uncle of all track and field-themed video games, aptly entitled Track & Field. Track & Field is one of Konami's most loved arcade franchises, as well as one of their breakthrough non-shooter titles, but also one that has divided opinions with a consistently stronger iron hand as time has rolled by, due to its simplicity - or as some would call it, tiresome one-button gameplay. Well, back in 1983, Konami knew how to make it work.

Harder, faster!

The original home version of Track & Field was never very well known outside North America; as a matter of fact, it was called Hyper Olympic outside the U.S., which means the name Track & Field did very little to ring a bell before Track & Field II came out internationally near the end of the decade. That game was actually the fourth game in the series, as the actual second game - called Hyper Sports - was released in the arcades and on choice home computers in 1984, and the third game, commonly known as Konami '88, was released in Japanese arcades in 1988. To add to the confusion just a little bit more, the NES version of the first game was re-released by Kemco as Track & Field in Barcelona in 1992, four years AFTER the release of Track & Field II. To add to the confusion EVEN more, the international NES version of Track & Field - released in 1987 - differs from the Japanese Famicom version, which was released in 1985. Eyes = crossed.

I rule at Triple Jump. I need not be humble.

I was one of those kids who played Track & Field II and wondered whatever happened to the first game, or if the "II" was some kind of a clever marketing ploy no one really understood. Track & Field in Barcelona looked like an older game, but it was released in 1992. To add to my personal confusion, a friend of mine had the original game called Track & Field on his Commodore 64. All of this resulted in the false conclusion that the original game was never available on the NES. It was only five or six years ago that I learned the truth, that an NES game called Hyper Olympic was actually the original Track & Field game. It was around that same time I realized that Konami's Track & Field and Kemco's Track & Field in Barcelona are one and the same, with no essential changes made to any other element besides the title screen. The re-release is also just a bit more colourful, but that's it for the differences - although I know the game better than the original one, it would make no sense to review it separately.

It comes as no surprise that this guy looks quite
like Mario.

There are eight different "designs" to accommodate eight different events: the 100 Meter Dash, Long Jump, Javelin Throw, 110 Meter Hurdles, Skeet Shooting, Triple Jump, Archery and High Jump. Six events are played from a side-scrolling 2D perspective, while Archery has an overhead view, and some sort of 3D effect was used for Skeet Shooting. Another point is that Archery and Skeet Shooting are exclusive to the NES version alongside Triple Jump, while Hammer Throw from the original arcade version is fortunately ousted - it sucked. The international NES version, especially the re-release, could therefore be seen as the most technically advanced version of the game, although it might not look like much - especially if you were one of those people who got to try Track & Field II first. There's no music besides an 8-bit version of Vangelis' "Chariots of Fire" and a couple of olympic fanfares that play before and after each event, with the tone of the tune changing depending on your performance. Track & Field might not look or sound that sweet, but it plays out like the classic it is, and that's all that matters.

Archery. Used to hate it 'cause I just didn't get it,
now it's one of my favourites.

Although each event is different, Track & Field is one of the easiest games to learn. Each side-scrolling event has you repeatedly tapping the A button as fast as you possibly can, and occasionally pressing a directional button to jump, adjust, or determine an angle, depending on the event. Skeet Shooting is based on well-timed, consecutive single presses of the A button. Archery, which is arguably the most challenging event in the game but one that the player is perfectly able to master with some practice, is also based on good timing, even moreso. Your goal is to shoot an arrow at the exact right time and perfect angle, which is determined by wind direction, which on the other hand is determined at random in the beginning of each session. There are no crappy events in the NES version of Track & Field, no event that I absolutely loathe. Closest to crossing the border of hate comes High Jump, and it's mostly because it's the final event - botching it equals to Game Over, and it's quite easy to botch it with a 0.0001% fraction of your moustached avatar's pixelated ass being so in love with the horizontal bar. Passing the final event takes luck - but luckily it's not nearly as bad as Hammer Throw in other versions of the game. This one is pretty much endless fun...

...Or is it? Well, no. If you're looking for something deep, you won't find it here. Unlike the tense desire to accomplish in Track & Field II, there's no true olympic feeling to this game. After passing the eight events for the first time, especially the more challenging Game B, there's no goal besides constantly going for a higher score and breaking records - which is at its most fun when you're going against a friend. But, what you have to remember is that Track & Field is a simple arcade game, and it was never meant to be anything else. As such, Track & Field is one of the best, and most enduring games there is. It's still an amazing way to pass some otherwise dead 15 minutes every now and then.

UPS
+ Simple gameplay (which is ALL that really matters); so simple that it might annoy the hell out of some people, but it's classic and works much better in practice than the three-button version

DOWNS
- No lasting feeling of accomplishment

< 8.7 >

---

XBOX 360 VERSION (2007)

The Xbox LIVE Arcade version of Track & Field came out in the summer of 2007 as a part of Digital Eclipse Entertainment and Konami's arcade classics program, and it was a direct conversion of the very original arcade game, that offered up the option of "enhanced graphics". The enhanced graphics look like ass. The original graphics are uglier and way more rough-edged than the NES version's (!), but by far, the only way to go. Wait. IS there a way to go when it comes to this version of the game? No.

Of course I bought this game when I spotted it on LIVE - Track & Field is one of my favourite arcade games of all time, and this one came with Achievements! However, as it turned out, the original arcade game released four years before what I perceive as the "true version" sucked ass from here to Barcelona, and out of the 12 Achievements, only four are obtainable before you start to hate this game.

The fifth event out of six - which is the Hammer Throw - is the final dealbreaker, but there are problems scattered all over this stinker. As I see it, it's impossible to actually win in any event. This is all about simply qualifying. No matter how hard and fast I "run" in the 100 Meter Dash, the opponent - yeah, the annoying black guy - ALWAYS wins. To top it off, the 100 Meter Dash Achievement (there's at least one tied to every event) requires you to finish under 10 seconds. If you've got normal hands, you can't do this in under 10:01. Can't help being annoyed by that number.

The records are just crazy. The world record for the Hurdles stands at 0:02. That crazy - frankly, batshit insane, way beyond impossible. I don't know where the hell that comes from. Every crazy thing about this version of a good game comes to an anticlimax of the ages with the Hammer Throw. It's not impossible to qualify - after all, I've managed to do it ONCE - but it depends on pure luck. Your goal is to tap the dash button (or alternatively, rotate the left analog stick) until you hit the quarter of a second window to throw that damn hammer so that it actually goes in the direction of the field. If you manage to do that, all that is left is hope that you actually qualify - it's still perfectly possible to fuck up by half a meter and get a very unceremonial Game Over. You can't practice, and you can't choose the order of the events. If you fuck up in Hammer Throw, it's back to the beginning with you. If you somehow manage to qualify, you've still got High Jump and its very own luck-based problem to deal with. If you simply can't beat this game or get anything done in it for your own personal good or for the good of your Gamerscore, don't beat yourself up about it. It's not your fault. This game just sucks.

I strongly advise you to put your 400 Points to good use - it's not Track & Field. If you want a Konami classic from the program that actually works and provides some real challenge, and have a friend to play with, try Contra instead. When I first played this version of the game, the words "blank fart" were the first to pop to mind, and they still ring very true.

UPS
+ Well, I guess it's kinda cheap - kinda, maybe, perhaps

DOWNS
- It looks and sounds horrible, even moreso with enhanced graphics!
- If there was no feeling of accomplishment in the previously reviewed game, this one has even less due to records you simply cannot break - it's hard enough to qualify
- Hammer Throw ruins everything - it's simply a loathsome event, and I'm missing some of my favourite NES-exclusive events that originally replaced Hammer Throw in the NES version

< 4.5 >

Castlevania: Lords of Shadow DLC Guide

Gabe Belmont > Gabe Logan.

I have just one loose end to tie up before going for a swim in the sea of retro.

I mentioned Castlevania: Lords of Shadow in the last entry as a game that would deserve another look - if I was one to ever look twice. Well, I went into the DLC with high hopes that through a DLC Guide, I could bring my new found respect for the game to light. I mean, how bad can a few more levels carved from the same wood as the original Castlevania: Lords of Shadow be?

Once installed, the DLC initially makes no notion of its existence. It's unlocked once there's a completed save file of Castlevania: Lords of Shadow, which means that if you're yet to finish the game, you'd do good to stop reading now and come back later - there are spoilers abound.

In Castlevania: Lords of Shadow, Gabriel Belmont, one of the Brotherhood of Light, sets out on a long journey to recover a relic called the God Mask, which he thinks holds the power to resurrect his wife Marie, brutally murdered just days before the game's events. The three Lords of Shadow each hold a piece of the mask; Cornell, the Lord of the Lycans, Carmilla, the Lord of the Vampires, and Zobek, the Lord of the Necromancers. Zobek, the final Lord, actually follows and assists Gabriel the whole time, and disguises himself as one of the Brotherhood to claim the power of the Lords of Shadow all for himself. Zobek is defeated by Satan, who reveals himself to be the mastermind behind "Zobek's plan", and steals the God Mask to exact revenge upon God. Gabriel defeats Satan, but is devastated to find that all this time, he has misinterpreted the God Mask's power. Marie's ghost assures Gabriel that his journey was not in vain, as he saved the world, before vanishing, leaving Gabriel crying in agony.

After the credits, a hooded figure is seen entering a church, obviously looking for someone or something, and eventually reveals himself as Zobek. On a throne in the highest tower of the church sits a brooding, ghostly figure once known as Gabriel Belmont - now known as "Dracul". Satan is expected to return, and Zobek (somewhat arrogantly) asks "his old friend's" help in his fight for freedom. Gabriel attacks Zobek, but is quickly countered and thrown through the window - to the middle of a street in a modern metropolis. Zobek promises to free Gabriel of the burden of immortality if he agrees to help. Gabriel vanishes, without giving a straight answer.

How the hell did this happen? How did Gabriel become the immortal king of vampires? What happened to Laura? How overtly difficult and tedious can a boss battle be these days? What is a man? Answers to these and many more questions are found in Reverie and Resurrection - I wish I could go tell my past self to just wait for Lords of Shadow 2 to come and explain things.

The two DLC packs are two parts of a short story that could've just as easily been released as one single pack, and should've been, especially since the first one seems to hog all the remotely good parts of the whole story, as well as all the remotely good gameplay elements.

---

Tell me, child... do you know the term
"deathlike silence"?

REVERIE
RELEASED: March 2011
PRICE: €7.95 (PlayStation Network EU), $9.99 (PlayStation Network US) 800 Microsoft Points (Xbox LIVE)

As he's reflecting on the remains of his miserable life after defeating Satan, Gabriel hears Laura calling out to him telepathically, summoning him back to the vampires' castle. In vanquishing the three Lords of Shadow, Gabriel has unknowingly unleashed an ancient demon known as the Forgotten One, imprisoned somewhere beneath the castle. Gabriel and Laura are very likely the last two survivors powerful enough to fight this abomination that has its mind set on destroying humanity.

The first thing that hits you about the DLC, and does it surprisingly hard, is that the cutscenes are totally different from those in the game, being the kind of animated, rough concept art that made Metal Gear Solid: Peace Walker's cutscenes boring to watch despite their own kind of beauty. It all feels so detached from the game. My friend - who's a huge fan of Lords of Shadow, he considers it one of his favourite games of all time, which means he's very defensive of the DLC as well - theorized that this was done for financial reasons, but my theory is that a relatively realistic cutscene depicting brutal violence towards a child just could not get past censors, and that cutscene was absolutely necessary for storytelling's sake.

Both of the packs have their own sorts of weaknesses, and not much strengths. Even enjoying the game to the max doesn't guarantee you'd want anything to do with this expansion of the story once you've got it out of the way just that one time. In theory, Reverie is a balanced mix of tough puzzles, tricky level design and tense action. However, there are no boss fights, and the puzzles... well, there are a couple of clever ones, but a good chunk of simply dumb ones as well. When it comes to the level design, I simply HATE the part where you have to guide Gabriel across a wall with rotating blades that move in all directions, and command Laura to either speed the blades up or slow them down, with both commands being necessary. The quality of precision controls swung back and forth in the original game, and unfortunately, Reverie is nearly all about precision - Resurrection takes the cake, but more about that later.

Laura is an occasionally playable character. Finding out about this was like getting a flare shot in my groin. Like most child characters in video games, Laura is fatally annoying, and she never shuts up. She had tagged along for less than a minute when the first true puzzle came up, and I couldn't concentrate at all with her yelling out her absolutely pointless clues throughout the puzzle. I had to mute the TV just to get past that first puzzle. I hoped that I wouldn't be stuck with her much longer, but no, she's there throughout the whole thing - and then suddenly she's a playable character, who runs slowly and can't jump at all. Being a vampire, she has some skills which some people will surely consider neat, like regaining health by sucking her enemies' blood and electrocuting the hell out of them, but I simply didn't enjoy playing as her.

Reverie is filled with subtle plot inconsistencies on the top of everything else, and halfway through, the only reason for me to keep playing is finding out what happens in the end. Well, there is no ending. Just a cool plot twist which I liked a lot, but then I found out that instead of being somewhat of an ending, it merely sets the stage for the final battle which takes place in the second DLC pack - for which Konami charges even more! There's no actual climax. It's like: "Here's four additional levels for ya, without a real ending though - wanna know the conclusion? Pay up!" Well, let's pay up; it's not fun, it's a fatal blow to my budget (a total of 1600 Points for all of THIS? SICK!), but I guess that after all I've been through, I might as well go all the way. Bring on Resurrection! ...Oh, my God.

RATING : 6.2

---

You should've remained forgotten.

RESURRECTION
RELEASED: June 2011
PRICE: €9.95 (PlayStation Network EU), $9.99 (PlayStation Network US) 800 Microsoft Points (Xbox LIVE)

Gabriel's new found immortality is his key to the dimensional rift, once a prison built to seal the Forgotten One's power. The demon is now awake, and Gabriel is about to come face to face with his most destructive foe yet.

First of all, Resurrection is more expensive than Reverie on the European PSN (it's priced the same everywhere else), which makes no sense, 'cause there are only two levels, no collectables at all (Reverie had the Frankenstein Fingers for Trophy/Achievement hunters) and it's extremely straightforward. The main themes here are combat skill, stealth and precision. Well, that can't bode well, and it doesn't. I'll get to the combat later, but stealth and precision, especially the two combined, are not Castlevania: Lords of Shadow's strong suits, that much is known from the beginning. You can expect more than one or two unforgiving platform jumping sequences, which last for a decade each. The awkward camera angles that made their presence known in the original game are back worse than ever, to put a serious cap on it all.

How does stealth fit into the picture? Well, most of the DLC is about following the Forgotten One's trail as he makes his way out of the prison, until he gets into a wide open area where it would be the least unhealthy for Gabriel to challenge him. During these times, you need to hide from his gaze in every way possible, either by finding a safe, shadowy gap in a wall, or circle around a block of stone he's planning to use as a battering ram to make himself a doorway. I guess he's really not too bright, it's so easy to avoid a straight line of sight. At least it would be, if the controls responded properly and precision jumping worked 100% of the time. Especially when you have to jump towards the screen - God, how I hate when that happens - across some platforms floating in the lava. One slightly false move, one slightly false double jump, and you will burn. The "circle around the block" sequence ends with a series of QTE's which is made almost impossible to nail the first time by the QTE circle's fast, excessive movement, to as far as off-screen.

Resurrection is the most difficult chapter of the whole game, as expected, but before the final boss fight against the Forgotten One, it's for all the wrong reasons. I expected this DLC madness to end on a high note, and at first it seems that the Forgotten One is an epic, truly challenging boss... until his very final phases. Screw up in any of the three final phases (there are five in all, counting the first fight in the first level) and you're always pushed back to the third-to-last phase. What makes this fight extremely tedious is that there's absolutely no fail-safe way to recover any magic or health in this whole God damn pack! You won't have any chance against this fucker if you enter the final battle with any less than max health and max magic, and the only way to understand this is to do it, try, fail, go back to some other level to fill up (and complete that level, otherwise the game won't register your efforts), restart the whole level, do the enfuriating lava dance all over again and hope you're still at max health when you finally face the big cheese. And he's STILL HARD! Why? Because the controls have a tendency to suck, your enemy is completely unpredictable, AND he's getting harder to hit and more likely to hit you with every passing phase!!! I know it sounds like a good old school challenge, but the thing is that even point blank hits are not always registered as such, as long as you're the hitter - and this guy's AOE attacks are almost impossible to dodge without taking the slightest hit, even though you SHOULD be out of harm's way. I swear, I haven't cursed this hard and loud in years. There's not even a feeling of accomplishment in making this dude bleed. There's no sure-fire strategy when it comes to the final phases. It's all about good fortune.

Resurrection comes with five new Trophies/Achievements, one less than Reverie that had those collectables to add up to one more accomplishment. Whereas Reverie might just barely be applicable for another playthrough for a serious vampire bloodmonger, Resurrection just simply isn't worth the futile effort. Both of these add-ons could've been laid to eternal rest before they ever saw a slight glimpse of daylight, but Reverie is almost satisfying on some level - Resurrection is just plain horrible, considering its high price at the very least. If you still haven't paid your ass off to get these, be glad you haven't, and don't. Wait for Lords of Shadow 2, I'm sure it'll all be explained again, and in better context. Even the guys at MercurySteam have admitted this DLC was a mistake they'd gladly take back.

RATING : 4.3