sunnuntai 25. marraskuuta 2012

Looking back and going there

"I say we're growing every day, getting stronger in every way
I'll take you to a place where we shall find our roots, bloody roots."
- Sepultura

My queen.
I'm sorry about the vagueness of the last update, I was in a hurry. Now I have a few minutes to spare and continue where I left off. So, I got a "new" console. Actually, I didn't get it quite yet, and it's far from new; my girlfriend went and bought me a working NES unit for Christmas, bundled with a bunch of mystery games. I love that girl. I wasn't supposed to find out about this purchase of hers, but she has a tendency of leaving her e-mail wide open on her laptop (she bought it from an online auction). Of course, I couldn't shut up about discovering her scheme, but she made it clear that I'm not getting to polish that treasure before Christmas Eve. I guess VGArchive will have to wait a while, 'til I know what games I'll be getting.

Bragging about how much more awesome my girl's than yours, and how much more awesome this Christmas present is than your Wii U, is a perfect intro for what I'm about to lay down. That Sepultura excerpt, too, although I hate Sepultura. It's all about the roots.

Same old song, maybe. But that song is "Bloody Tears".
Enough said.
The year's been seriously tough on this blog, and on many occasions, I have wondered aloud whether it would help to go back to where it all started, to the roots of inspiration. Well, now I'm finally going to grab the bull by the horns and take the blog back to those roots. I have one more God of War game to review, then the 007 marathon, and from there on out, we're going to tie loose ends as long as there are some left. Classic franchises: Mega Man, Castlevania, Metal Gear, Metroid (Super Metroid has been there in wait for follow-ups for who knows how long, it was the first review I ever wrote). Even Donkey Kong and Mario, who were supposed to be completely dealt with, will return in some capacity. Of course, the recently halted Legend of Zelda marathon will come to a head in the near future as well, it's as much of a loose end as the rest of 'em. Also, there will be late updates to some of my most exhausting marathons such as Star Wars and Disney. And, what would a loose end killing spree be without going into some games that I know to have absolutely no potential to be worth the media format they're printed on? Finally, I have lots of interesting marathons in mind for next year. None of them involve any recent releases, but I think some future releases will inevitably end up being hyped to hell and back on these pages, and taking up a lot of my time. Nevertheless, now I have a clear plan where I'm going for the first time in months, and I think it will be a fun trip, a reminder of what made blogging great in the first place.

I don't think I'm doing anything "special" for Christmas, except for a collection check (VGArchive will probably still not be in a viewing shape by then) and I think there'll be one truck of an article on the NES for some odd reason. Other than that, I'll stick to writing reviews, hopefully lots of 'em. The final count on the 007 marathon stands at 12 titles, released between 1985 and 2003. So, go see Skyfall if you haven't already - even if you're not much of a Bond fan, you will probably enjoy the movie - and get ready for some hardcore 007 nerdiness, right after I've finished with God of War: Ghost of Sparta, thus taking care of that loose end.

lauantai 24. marraskuuta 2012

REVIEW - God of War: Chains of Olympus | PSP | 2008

GENRE(S): Action
RELEASED: March 4, 2008
AVAILABLE ON: PS3 [God of War Collection Volume II / God of War Saga], PSP
DEVELOPER(S): SCE Santa Monica Studio, Ready at Dawn Studios
PUBLISHER(S): Sony Computer Entertainment

I've been down with an angina and a high fever for the last four or five days - lost count at some point on Thursday, and blame the painkillers - and haven't been able to begin work on the new marathon. I wanted to deliver at least something this weekend, and it seems that whenever I'm in the middle of something I can't really finish at that exact moment, I turn to a pet franchise - namely God of War. Back when I reviewed the magnificent God of War III, one of the main things that drove me to criticize the game a little was closure and continuity to storylines that a lot of players were not familiar with - ones that were introduced in the 2008 handheld game Chains of Olympus, which served as a prequel to the very original God of War. Some other odd scenes turned out to be teasers for yet another PSP exclusive called Ghost of Sparta, which on the other hand was a prequel to God of War II. I, for one, was enraged and pretty sure I'd never get to see those games myself. May the god of war bless Santa Monica Studios, who made good by listening to the fans and re-released both PSP exclusives on the PlayStation 3 in late 2011, as two halves that make up for the God of War Collection Volume II (a.k.a. God of War Origins Collection). The path is finally open to see if these two games were ever worth the hype. First up, God of War: Chains of Olympus - played on the PlayStation 3, but reviewed from the perspective of a guy who's spent quite a lot of time with the PSP in general. In other words, this review is a mix of both - the handheld, and big-screen HD versions of the game.

Breaking the chains

STARRING
TC Carson : Kratos
Debi Derryberry : Calliope
Marina Gordon : Persephone / Female Greek
Dwight Schultz : Charon / Helios / Male Greek / Fire Guard
Fred Tatasciore : Atlas / Persian King / Soldier #1
Erin Torpey : Eos / Athena
Brian Kimmet : Soldier #2
Don Luce : Soldier #3
Andrew Wheeler : Soldier #4
Linda Hunt : Narrator / Gaia

Helios disappears, which results in the sun plummeting from the sky and all of the land and Mount Olympus itself succumbing to the eternal night of Morpheus, god of dreams. Growing weary of the gods' demands, their champion Kratos reluctantly agrees to find Helios and restore the sun. However, a more personal task once again tempts Kratos to care little for the needs of others.

Can't bode well for the ugly.
Let's start with a really positive note, 'cause it's been a while. God of War, man, God of War! Ever since I first caught wind of the mere plot and setting of God of War when it entered the last stages of production in late 2004, I knew it was destined to become one of my favourite video games, and it did, it absolutely did. It took the best of every 3D action-adventure that came before it - most notably Devil May Cry - and cleaned 'em all right off the table with unparalleled presentations of epic sceneries and over-the-top graphic violence. Kratos was a whole new kind of protagonist, always putting his needs above others' - if he was asked to save the world, fine, but he did it on his own terms and for his very own reasons. If he had to kill a few innocent people to get to his goal, he didn't mind. If the stakes were torn between his peace of mind and peace all over Greece, he chose himself and his personal needs. As Kratos would put it, "he cared little for the world and its problems". God of War turned out a masterpiece, one of PlayStation 2's finest. God of War II turned out even better. God of War III was at the very least on par with the first two games, and it stands as one of the PlayStation 3's flagship games two and a half years after its release. In the between, there was God of War: Chains of Olympus, and it was greatly received by critics; some even went to the no-zone and named Chains of Olympus the best game in the franchise.

You're not going to hear that from me, but God of War: Chains of Olympus is a very good game, and one of the best handheld games ever made, no matter how conflicted it might feel like on the outside. Let's think about it as a part of the timeline, first. Chains of Olympus is a prequel to the first God of War game, so up 'til the release of God of War: Ascension next spring, it chronologically stands as the first chapter in Kratos' saga. God of War was all about doubt; how could a mortal kill a god? You could ask this question and promotion for the first game would be all done - it sounds awesome. It is awesome, everything about how it unfolds is awesome. In the end, Kratos kills Ares and due to a "loophole" in his contract with the gods, he is denied the prize he fought for and decides to end his life. The gods deny even that relief from him, and instead, crown him as a successor to Ares, setting the stage for the next chapter. That is so epic. And so doubtful, that what could Kratos possibly have done to shine half as bright before all this happened? Leave that for Santa Monica Studios to work out, and you've got a plot in which Kratos investigates the apparent abduction of a god, and in the process, is led to believe he is able to save his daughter - whom he "accidentally murdered" - from the afterlife. Does that work for you? It does for me, and after seeing this game to the end (twice), I have no doubts that Santa Monica will come up with another satisfying prequel story for Ascension.

I have to be honest. God of War: Chains of Olympus is exactly the same as any other God of War game. But, when you think about it, that's a true accomplishment. Keep in mind that it's a PSP game. I liked Crisis Core very much - would I like to play a port of Crisis Core on the PS3? No. It would only bring out the worst in the game. The Grand Theft Auto games released on the PSP were formidable handheld entertainment, true Rockstar quality in that small format, but the PS2 ports sucked, although they were exactly the same; they simply didn't live up to the major platform standards of Grand Theft Auto in any way. God of War: Chains of Olympus, however, is a full-blooded God of War game - an experience any long-time fan of the series will surely enjoy. The control scheme is just genius, as the developers seriously sacrificed a minimal amount of any features you'd have in any major God of War game. Visual presentation's a different thing, but an area that lacks both understandably and tolerably.

There's ALWAYS time for love.
Not very many epic boss fights against giants to be had here, and just about any character notably larger than a human - the kind we've grown expecting to see in this franchise - is either a part of the background or cutscene, or a very brief QTE scene. In addition, Chains of Olympus looks very bland - not ugly, but bland, and a bit "fuzzy", despite the surprisingly thorough rendition for the HD collection. The way it sounds is far from bland. There's a mix of tunes from the first two games, and new songs from Gerard Marino, who worked on the previous in some capacity. It's just as epic as you'd expect, and there are audiovisual surprises and treats throughout that will remind you where this game spawned from, you can count on that.

As I said, God of War: Chains of Olympus is a full-blooded God of War game, despite the fact that it was originally a handheld exclusive AND that the violence that was probably quite impressive and oochy on the PSP ends up lacking a lot of punch on the big screen. Were it not for the severely downgraded graphics, you wouldn't know the difference between the first God of War game and this one in any average scene taking place during the first half of the game. All of you who've read this review this far probably know what God of War's all about as a game - killing, and puzzles. Yes, there are both of them present here, more of the killing though. No boss fights against gods or titans, but a couple of yummy ones for the history books. Let's get to the points that truly annoy me about this game before wrapping it up.

I've never been a sworn enemy of Quick Time Events - God of War basically popularized them, and had a huge flaw in its QTE scheme, namely analog prompts. They never worked right, especially not in the first game. Well, just imagine analog prompts on the PSP, which has a disc instead of a stick. I can't imagine - or actually, I CAN imagine - how they must feel on the PSP. Luckily, most analog prompts in this game are "completely optional" (you guessed it, not for Trophy hunters they aren't), but they are a tide-turner in one of the boss fights. No, the analog prompts don't work too well for the port, either. Luckily, ferociously wiggling the analog stick back and forth to shake off an enemy is completely replaced by alternating between L1 and R1. That is one common prompt I've always hated in every game - I've lost many controllers to this scourge during the last decade. I'm so glad it isn't here. Since we're talking positives here, remember the walks on narrow walkways and how annoying they would be in a PSP game? Well, get ready for a positive surprise after completing one in the PS3 version.

The temple of Helios. A little too much light for
my taste.
Other things that might annoy at least some folk are the simplicity, easiness, and once again "ugliness" of the game. I'm there with you with the simplicity and easiness. Chains of Olympus is a handheld, very basic God of War game, and nothing more, BUT you've got to give credit to it as the PSP showcase Santa Monica originally wanted delivered, that they managed to fit the challenges and all that here. But, it is easy. It's almost as lengthy as the first game, but very easy - on the usual high standard of the God of War franchise, so don't go thinking it's a walk in the park. The collectables are easy to find (and there are plenty of spares), all weapons and equipment are easy to upgrade to the max by the end of the game, enemy and boss strategies are easy enough to learn, the PSP's capacity doesn't allow huge, neverending bedlams (or they didn't dare to try 'em out) and everything's just generally lax, probably in thought of PSP user comfort. Beating the game on Hard yields the Trophy "Getting Your Money's Worth", which probably reflects on the fact that Hard is pretty much what most God of War games are on Normal. There are some really hard and frustrating individual scenes in the game, and the challenges are as brutal as ever, and there's that one Trophy which requires you to respond to the analog prompts a lot more often you'd want to, making the Platinum Trophy that much more of a mere flicker of light in the distant horizon.

God of War: Chains of Olympus was a very positive surprise. I honestly didn't expect enjoying it this much, let alone going at it twice in a month. It's a brilliant handheld game, an exceptionally brilliant port and alone serves as great proof that a God of War fan and PS3 owner will certainly get his/her money's worth with the second God of War collection. I'll get back to you with Ghost of Sparta in a couple of days.

UPS
+ A surprisingly full-blooded God of War installment with minimal sacrifices made to the traditional gameplay scheme
+ Kratos
+ Great music and a familiar, comfortable atmosphere

DOWNS
- The story is good, but it lacks the epic drive and crazy twists of the major timeline
- The analog prompts suck
- The divide between combat and puzzles is not as even as I hoped
- It's a bit easy on the usual scale, partly due to understandable issues with the capacity
- You can't skip cutscenes on the first playthrough, not even on the 23rd viewing (the final boss gave me a little bit of trouble on the first run)

< 9.0 >

lauantai 17. marraskuuta 2012

007, VGArchive and more

Hi everybody!

So, the year 2012 is coming to its end on this blog, meaning there are no more big releases to first draw a lot of attention and then leave a long pause at their wake. I've recovered well from the Assassin's Creed III slump and while I am replaying some more or less recent games right now - Dragon Age II in particular, I'm attempting to plat the game and I'm not too far off either - I think I'm ready to get back to work on what I've promised, and what's long due. They're separate things this time around.

I was browsing through the X-files of my blog archive and I was kind of disappointed in myself when I found three incomplete, and naturally unpublished reviews. Saved them up on my hard drive for further research and eventual completion. There were also a couple of unfinished DLC Guides there, which means I must've really suffered from a severe writer's block a few months back - I usually love doing those, even more than I love doing reviews. Well, but all of this is up for a rain check - I promised to deliver you some James Bond and that I will, starting next week.

Iconic. Iconic.

I have a wide array of 007 games of different nature, for different platforms, at my direct disposal. This makes the 007 marathon the most interesting marathon for me to write since Star Wars and Disney a long while back (in case you haven't heard, those two things walk hand in hand nowadays... blech). Although 007 Legends would be the perfect game to cap off the marathon, it's too new (read: expensive) and it hasn't piqued my interest enough to find its way on my shelf. Even the newest game in this bunch is at least ten years old, which means I will follow up on the retro theme faithfully - although not by intent.

I've been asked about VGArchive, why it's looked like ass since I announced to have created it, and why updates stopped turning in several months ago. I've never liked the look of the site (I didn't have a problem with it when I was writing the material, though... happens all the time), and I have spent some small hours in recent weeks with the intent of completely redesigning the whole site to a much better look, and moreover, a complete site equipped with everything that's supposed to be there. I'm currently transferring my review backlog to the archive, which is one of the final stages of this new design process - in other words, you might see VGArchive in all the glory that was always supposed to be, as early as next week.

Oh yeah. Today, my console collection grew by one, and my game collection by ten. I'll proudly spill the details at a later time. :)

tiistai 13. marraskuuta 2012

REVIEW - Assassin's Creed III | Xbox 360 | 2012

GENRE(S): Action
RELEASED: October 2012
AVAILABLE ON: PC, PS3, Wii U, Xbox 360
DEVELOPER(S): Ubisoft Montreal, Ubisoft Annecy, Ubisoft Singapore
PUBLISHER(S): Ubisoft

We've reached the end of a long route. Straight after the release of the 2009 surprise megahit Assassin's Creed II, Ubisoft's Montreal, Annecy and Singapore branches each began work on a different part of what was to become Assassin's Creed III. However, these branches, as well as a few others, worked on two more appetizers in the between, to repeat and expand the successful Assassin's Creed II formula. While Assassin's Creed: Brotherhood was commonly regarded another great game to solidify a great legacy, Assassin's Creed: Revelations proved to be a severe disappointment for many. It had a stale, hopelessly strange story that lacked in spirit as well as true growth, and the steps taken forth in gameplay were always countered by a few steps back. In my view, the Assassin's Creed franchise took a huge fall with the release of Assassin's Creed: Revelations. Running on a whole new engine, Assassin's Creed III was brought to us to redeem the franchise - set on the U.S. East Coast during the American Revolutionary War, the game introduces us to Native American warrior Connor Kenway, a young man on a quest to avenge the wrongs committed against him and his family by ways of the Assassin's Creed. Sounds very familiar, but it's not. It's much like what we've seen of this franchise thus far, but then again, it's not. It's a new era of Assassin's Creed, and while not quite in league with what Assassin's Creed II was when it came out, it's a welcome sight to behold.

Assassin's Redemption

STARRING
Noah Watts : Ratonhnhaké:ton, a.k.a. Connor Kenway
Nolan North : Desmond Miles
Neil Napier : Charles Lee
Robin Atkin Downes : George Washington
Roger Aaron Brown : Achilles Davenport
John de Lancie : William Miles
Danny Wallace : Shaun Hastings
Eliza Schneider : Rebecca Crane
Phil Proctor : Warren Vidic
Adrian Hough : Haytham Kenway

They look ready enough to bring this confusing
journey to a head.
Desmond Miles leads the Assassins right on the doorstep of the Grand Temple, but finds out via the Bleeding Effect, that to open the final door standing between them and the hope they believe to find within the confines of the temple, they need a special kind of key, hidden somewhere on the U.S. East Coast by one of Desmond's ancestors. Growing weary of the Assassins' demands of him but still determined to do the right thing, Desmond enters the Animus one more time to explore the memories of one Ratonhnhaké:ton, an 18th century Assassin of Native American origin and once holder of the aforementioned key. When Ratonhnhaké:ton is five years old, his village is attacked and burned down by British soldiers. Watching his mother die, the boy swears revenge, and leaves his village in his teens to join the Brotherhood, seeking for the core group responsible for the attack. During his hotheaded march for revenge, the boy now known as "Connor" inadvertently gets mixed up with the beginning of the Revolutionary War.

My expectations for this game were very mixed between the reaction I originally had with the first and fourth major games in the series, and the reaction I had with the second and third ones. The Assassin's Creed franchise has spawned great games - wonderful games, some of the best ever - but also disappointing, lacking games without true content, not to mention some really crappy portable iterations (or so I hear). Assassin's Creed hasn't been nearly as consistent as Metal Gear was from its original, classic MSX debut up to Metal Gear Solid 4: Guns of the Patriots, or as Grand Theft Auto has been from Grand Theft Auto III to this day. Besides, the last couple of years have brought us some (very) good, but ultimately disappointing major installments in stellar franchises. Dragon Age II, Mass Effect 3, Uncharted 3: Drake's Deception, Dead Space 2, and most recently, Resident Evil 6. And, lest we forget, Assassin's Creed: Revelations, the last major game in this very series. It almost made me forget all about getting Assassin's Creed III before the game was even properly announced. The thing that made me return to the twisted political conspiracy of Assassin's Creed after the very disappointing debut, and paved the way for my fruitful relationship with the second game, was the incredible story they began telling in Assassin's Creed, and the fact it was to continue right where it left off in Assassin's Creed II. Well, that story is still going on, and supposed to come to its epic conclusion in Assassin's Creed III. There's a new, improved engine, and a new pseudo-protagonist, so I need not to worry about having to endure another Revelations or having to control an 80-year old Ezio Auditore. This is like a new beginning... and an end, at the same time, if this is really the end of Desmond Miles' journey. Of course I was ultimately led to expect an everlasting impression, the kind of which Assassin's Creed II left me with back in the day. That, I didn't get. But, I got a fabulous game which is a huge improvement over the previous installment - I'm quite happy with it. Not balls-off ecstatic, but happy.

It might sound like I have nothing but dirt to shove at Assassin's Creed: Revelations. That's not true, but I've got to say, that during the first four or five hours of Assassin's Creed III - which are widely considered the most boring in-game hours of this monster, mind you - I was beginning to think I was too SOFT on the game back in the day. Sure, in the long run the game's prologue turned out to last way too long, and a bit tedious, but it was STILL a better use for my time than any hour I spent with Revelations. The thing that made the prologue shine for me, at least on the first time around - is the fact that the fabulous story started five years ago is back on track, spot-on. It's filled with jaw-dropping twists and turns, the first major one of which comes in the end of the prologue, throwing you off the ball for as long as several minutes. It's just SICK, and offers up just the boost we fans needed to survive the slump. I'm not taking anything away from the intro of the game, showing off what they can accomplish with AnvilNext - which is surely a visual treat, but long-time followers and students of the Assassin's Creed story will have to wait for the tides to turn for those few hours - once again, it depends on how eager of an explorer you are. You can explore from the very beginning of the game, and the exploration data stays with you until the end despite the big turns in the story, and that's great. Exploration is very limited within missions, and there's no clear cut between them, but you'll get used to the game's rhythm in no time. You'll get used to a lot of things. In turn, you MUST get used to some less desirable things, unfortunately.

Look around, fool.
If there's one guy who defines Assassin's Creed, that's Ezio Auditore da Firenze, the way he was in Assassin's Creed II and Brotherhood - no-one wants to remember what he became in Revelations, a monotonic, too serious and even somewhat ugly version of himself. He was an extremely loveable, well-written, multilayered character, one of the best in the history of video gaming. It's no wonder Ubisoft found it so hard to let this guy go that they made a short animated movie to kill him off, since they didn't do it in Revelations, unlike they did to Altaïr - he was just too awesome at his best. He's also way too awesome to replace - which lands a whole bulk of expectations on Ratonhnhaké:ton. Like we followed Ezio from the cradle to the grave, we follow this guy from his tragic childhood to his mid-20's, and Ubisoft clearly saught after a sweet spot by making him a Native American, a representative of a group not seen in many games of this commercial caliber (if any) and equipping him with an authentic talent for the Mohawk language, as well as a deadly tomahawk. Everything about Ratonhnhaké:ton ("Connor" from now on, OK?) looks cool on the outside. As a child, he's probably the first, last and only child character ever to strike a good nerve as far as my personal preference is concerned. As an adult, he has some extremely epic moments to share with us... but in the end, he's just as cold and monotonous as a realist can expect from a character of his ethnic background. He's way too serious, has about two different facial expressions, and he misses out on a huge deal of what are supposed to be overtly dramatic exchanges. There were a lot of predictable - and expected - moments, that had all the potential to be some of the most epic moments ever seen in Assassin's Creed, and they turned out some of the most disappointing ones ever seen in Assassin's Creed.

Aside from some choice main villains of the game - many of which are once again based on real people to keep the tradition going - my favourite character in the game would have to be Connor's mentor Achilles, whose only crime is to be developed so hastily. There's a lot to his backstory I would've liked to hear, and although I would like to tell you details as well as the reason why, I choose not to spoil anything. Anyway, Achilles serves (among other things) as the spearhead of the game's underlying theme of racism. Being an elderly African-American in 18th century America, teaching a Native American child the ways of the Assassins, makes Achilles a good ally for Connor in terms of storytelling.

My conclusion of how this year's Animus bedtime story was pulled off? Well, Ubisoft promised us a personal story, and Assassin's Creed III tells a personal story - but only from the beginning to a certain DNA Sequence, between 6 and 9 (there are 12 in all). In the end, Assassin's Creed III leaves the taste of being a semi-fictional history lesson of how the Revolutionary War began, and how it ended - and how there was some nameless, faceless native in the midst of the events, and how he triggered some of the most important ones with his actions. Connor becomes more and more of a side character on the go - the main character is the war itself.

Mmm. I smell rabbit stew.
Then, there's Desmond. Finally, they made good use of him. I'll not spill too much details, but you're going to be playing as Desmond for a good while. No walking around a single room, checking for hotspots. No mere climbing around a storage room or beating up folks with generic combos while invincible. No exploring a historical site in the confines of a set piece platformer. And finally - most importantly - no Desmond's Journey or any of the kind of fuckery to be endured. No, this time it's the real deal. You're going to need a whole variety of skills in a few levels that make up for about one or two hours of the game's total length. There are even a few "boss fights", in the style of the franchise. This has been a long time coming, and I sincerely enjoyed playing as Desmond at certain points of the game. How Desmond's story continues and finally concludes is fascinating, but of course, I'm a little disappointed, especially with the conclusion. Once again, I can't help but think how leaving Revelations unwritten would have affected the plot in a positive way. It's not the worst conclusion ever, and I was near to applaud some certain aspects of it. Will there be an Assassin's Creed IV judging by the ending? I'm pretty sure there will. Will I buy the game? I'm damn sure I will.

The Xbox 360 version of Assassin's Creed III sports two discs, and the graphics are so phenomenally great, that I kind of expected it. However, all of it fits one disc - the second disc is for the multiplayer game, which means I have no use for it since I will never become a permanent Gold member, and I'm not a big fan of online multiplayer in general. This was just a sidenote, as I only meant to comment on the graphics. Indeed, the game looks simply superb. There are some problems with the draw distances and the thick fog present in all environments regardless of the season was obviously added in to cover up mistakes, but the facial scans, character movement, close distance environments... all phenomenal. The line between the previous games and this one is quite clear, although they weren't ugly by any measure, not even Revelations - only the facial scans sucked. Desmond looks a lot more like his counterpart in the first three games than he did in Revelations. Skinnier, though, which kind of makes sense since we've never seen him eat or drink, or do much besides strolling around in the Animus. This is getting out of hand...

The music is equally phenomenal. Lorne Balfe, who worked as Hans Zimmer's assistant on the bombastic soundtrack of The Dark Knight Rises, and also assisted previous series composer Jesper Kyd with Assassin's Creed: Revelations, returns as the only composer for this mix of epic and awesome, not to mention fitting. The same can't be said for all of the voiceover work. Nolan North rises from his slump as last year's iteration of Desmond Miles back to the top of the heap and delivers a performance even stronger he delivered in Brotherhood - he's not quite on the Nathan Drake level here, which is understandable since he adlibs most of Nate, but close. Adrian Hough and Roger Aaron Brown, quite the unknowns in the world of voiceover work, make good of their parts as Haytham Kenway (Connor's dad) and Achilles Davenport, respectively. Then we have Connor himself - Noah Watts. I'm impressed by his talent for authentic Mohawk, he drives most of the common dialogue just fine, but like I said, he misses out on some obvious, important cues by being so cold and monotonic throughout the line. They didn't even give him a signature like Ezio's "requiescat in pace". The character is not quite what I expected, and his voice doesn't make things any better. Finally, random NPC dialogue strangely reverts back to the quality of the first Assassin's Creed game: generic, repetitive and poorly performed. I lost count on all the "everlasting gratitude" I got from recipients of my deliveries. There was a lot of it. I felt like the person with the most everlasting NPC gratitude in history.

Assassins of the Caribbean.
At this point, it might be relevant to talk about the game's localization and how it drags the experience down. Why in the hell did they localize this game for so many languages? Did they really think that having Finnish subtitles would make the plot any easier to understand? If they did, they were all wrong. It's the complete opposite, especially with all the ridiculous typos and awkward dialogue that shifts in and out of context. You can switch the subtitles to another language of your preference or turn them off completely, that works, but even if the subtitles are in a language of your preference, the tutorials and info boxes still follow the regional settings of your console. That makes the game all the more confusing, so I chose to endure the ridiculous Finnish subtitles... but I don't want to see them ever again. Get this through your skulls: a game with an age-rating this high does not need localization. If we were stupid enough not to understand the English subtitles, we would surely be stupid enough not to understand the whole damn plot.

Time and time again, Ubisoft have claimed that the resemblances between basic exploration in Red Dead Redemption and Assassin's Creed III are of pure coincidence, as Assassin's Creed III was already under development when Rockstar's Wild West masterpiece came out. I don't believe any of it, but whichever the way the truth is, it's fun to experience a mix of one of the greatest games ever made and Assassin's Creed. The most notable difference is the transition between "levels". Red Dead Redemption didn't have any, it had a totally open world, while Assassin's Creed III reverts to the very roots of the franchise, giving us the "Frontier" which serves as the hub kind of like "Kingdom" did in the first game. A lot more interesting, though. Although the Frontier lacks specific landmarks, it has plenty of things to do. You can hunt animals in a very RDR-ish way, and sell their skins and valuable body parts for a lot of money, in another RDR-ish way. You can also use them to craft special items when you get to a more personal hub, which is your Homestead. More about that later; the point is that this is what RDR lacked, and it's a welcome addition... for a part, at least. There are also a lot of challenges and side missions waiting to be discovered, just like in the cities. You're going to spend a lot of time in the two hubs of the game - probably even more than in the cities.

Throughout, Assassin's Creed III is vertically very different from any previous installment. Sure, there are viewpoints, but at first it seems to lack extremely crazy ones like the ceilings of the Sistine Chapel or the Pantheon. Things get pretty crazy on the climbing front, believe me - well over the top - but indeed, most of the viewpoints are churches of regular size or high trees. Climbing is not such an important deal anymore. Which is good, 'cause the controls have the tendency of taking multiple dumps right on your face. Controls have always been a bit of a problem in this franchise's case, and just that the game's been heavily simplified by terms of the AnvilNext engine, does not mean it's constantly co-operative. Connor might refuse to climb altogether, as well as refuse to sprint or jump on cue. Oh well, at least this game never shoved the everlasting wall kick problem in my face, nor did any combat controls ever really have any holes.

Dynamic combat in the vein of recent Batman
games might not be to everyone's liking, but it
DOES look good. Extremely good.
Combat and stealth tactics are two gameplay features that have gone under serious improvements. Basic combat works pretty much the same it has since Brotherhood, but it's even smoother once you get hang of the rhythm for effective combos (which you'll need, 'cause you might be fighting tens of enemies at the same time!). Guns have become common weapons over the centuries between the Renaissance trilogy and this game; not only will you have a gun holstered up for some long-range mayhem, you also have to dodge enemy bullets regularly, or grab the nearest guy for a human shield whenever you're in the crosshairs of a whole firing squad. You can also disarm a soldier armed with a musket and use it to either blow his head off or stab him in the gut - even two guys at the same time, if they're attacking from both sides, prompting you to do a double counter in the vein of Batman: Arkham City. (The coolest stunt you can do with the musket is stab a guy and shoot another guy through the first guy's gut. You'll even get an Achievement for it.) There's a whole variety of weapons at your disposal as it is; knives, tomahawks, swords, axes, clubs, you name it. Not to mention environments that could turn out hazardous if taken the right kind of advantage of. Or rope darts, which you can use to either strangle or stab an enemy on your ground level, or hang them from trees - dastardly!!! Be creative. You must, if you're going for 100% completion.

Stealth tactics rip a page off Snake Eater's playbook, and even the playbooks of earlier Metal Gear games; abilities which should have been introduced to the franchise long ago. Everything you were able to do before works. You can start riots to gain vigilante assistance, you can blend with groups, take a seat on a public bench, hang on the inside of a well, all that to hide from enemies, but you can also parkour through open windows and doors of houses to throw enemies off the search, crawl through bushes and grass, and whatnot. Once again, the game will inspire you to be creative. Especially since you simply won't survive without learning at least half of these stealth tactics. Although combat and many aspects of the game are as easy as ever, remaining incognito is much harder than ever. Which means that for many players who treat this as a casual game will get their asses handed to them by the optional objectives of more than half of the missions. This time, there are more than one per each. Sometimes, they're really vague, and at more times, the game even forgets to mention them, and at even more times, they're made near-impossible to complete due to technical issues. Just something you must get used to, one of the less desirable things.

What's great, but also a bit illogical since Connor himself is far from a mentor, the Brotherhood returns with the strength of six recruitable Assassins. The very personal and unique training side missions were probably the best part of Revelations, and one of the only things improved upon between Brotherhood and Revelations - here it is improved upon once more. There are three individuals in different parts of both cities of the game - Boston and New York - fighting for liberty (and justice for all). They're regular folk that need your assistance in unique problems related to whatnot, like a pox epidemic or soldiers harrassing poor citizens desperately trying to make ends meet. When you've done enough for them, success in one last mission which usually involves getting rid of threat X once and for all blesses you with an Assassin recruit. Each of the six Assassin recruits brings in a unique talent. They can start riots on your behalf, disguise themselves as enemy soldiers and take you "hostage" for a sick prank for the ages, manage ambushes, and do old-fashioned stuff like bodyguarding and plain old killing. As always, you can send them out to different cities along the East Coast to do missions of their own for experience, items and money. Shops aren't that relevant, you can often craft better items than what they've got for sale, and you'd be amazed how far you can go with weapons you can get early on. There's no more property to buy - which is a relief, 'cause shit got ridiculous in the previous game - and no more armour sets to collect. There are several alternative outfits for you to collect to the basement of your mansion, won by advancing in the storyline, managing all challenges for a specific guild, managing a certain amount of optional mission objectives, etc. Assassin's Creed III is a very rewarding game. You'll feel good for your hard work, and it's not just because of concrete Achievements or Trophies. This is something that's been missing from a few recent genre games.

This is my boomstick.
On to the Davenport homestead - one place you'll be spending a whole lot of time in, more and more as the game presses on. The homestead starts off as a derelict mansion on a hill, but grows to a whole community as you hire more folk from all around the game - working men, such as farmers, blacksmiths, innkeepers, even a priest to offer moral support. All of the characters you bump into and offer a home to, have their own special side missions that serve a purpose. By utilizing their different talents, and upgrading them by doing further missions for them, you can craft just about anything from furniture to toys to food to medicine to the things that directly matter to you: weapon and equipment upgrades. The rest of the stuff can and should be sold to merchants around the coast. The crafting system is very complex and confusing at first, even frustrating, but I'm sure a lot of people will get a lot of kicks out of it. A variety of well known minigames such as morris and draughts aside, there's one new, prominent gameplay feature that caught my attention from the beginning, and it can be accessed from the homestead. I'm really surprised to say this myself, but I REALLY dig the naval missions.

Whenever I hear the words "naval mission", I immediately think of some real-time strategy game on the waves. Or better yet, the naval battles in The Curse of Monkey Island, which were that game's only low point, but which turned out pretty popular and ended up influencing just about every naval gameplay feature in any following game. Yeah, well, there's something oddly familiar about these missions as well, but they're fun as heck, at least in the beginning before they seriously start to repeat themselves. (As for the rest of the game, it doesn't repeat itself at all, it's very well balanced.) You gain access to a ship named the Aquila early on in the game's storyline, and you can use it to take the battle to the Templars on the high seas in several missions that usually don't involve anything more delicate than sinking a lot of ships with cannon fire. Which is fun, at first at least. The missions become more challenging on the go when frigates and man-o-wars are thrown into the mix, but not too different. The same tactics work throughout, and the expensive upgrades to the Aquila aren't worth it - as long as you have the basics of naval warfare covered, you'll do just fine. Even if the naval missions get a little stale towards the end, only a few unlock at a time, at just the right pace, so you might not even notice their increasing staleness before finishing the game.

The greatest flaw of Assassin's Creed III? If this was the final version of the game, I'd have to say the glitches. Glitches galore, everywhere, from amusing graphical errors such as Connor jerking off on top of a viewpoint - double the amusement if the viewpoint animation gets stuck on a loop - to devastating bugs that might utterly destroy your mission progress, or your chances at nailing some optional objective, if you're going for those. Ubisoft invested a lot in this game, so I believe it's going to be patched until it's just right, so I won't go into the glitches any further. The greatest flaw of this game is that there are absolutely no puzzles at all. Subject 16 is dead, but that doesn't mean they couldn't have come up with some loophole or new plot twist to add some great, creepy puzzles which were some of Assassin's Creed II and Brotherhood's best moments. What makes things worse is that they kind of promised something of the like. Connor tracking urban legends as inspired by frontiermen isn't the same thing at all. However, Ubisoft also promised to deliver us levels inspired by Assassin's Tombs and similar levels featured in both Brotherhood and Revelations. That they did. What's involved and what the levels are like are things I choose not to spoil, but I guarantee fun times and perhaps a few blown minds. They're kind of short, though, and perhaps there are a little too few of them altogether.

Rowboats didn't actually make the final cut, but
this is a good promotional picture nonetheless.
All of this is just a fraction of all the things you can do in Assassin's Creed III. It's an immense game that requires approximately 55 hours of gameplay to be fully completed - I got 96% in 50 hours, more or less sharp. Just when you think you've done all there is, another side mission, challenge or objective pops up, and it's heavily recommended to check each city and spit of land between each DNA Sequence. There's always something new, and at a lot of occasions, it's something exciting and inspiring. The most exciting and inspiring thing about this game is the storyline, even though it lacks some expression - it's the one thing that always changes, and the most consistent and balanced feature in terms of gameplay. Since you can continue to dash through the side missions after you've completed the game, it's perfectly understandable if you want the best the game has to offer out of the way first, but that way, you might see the side missions in a very different, repetitive light. Find your own pace and order for things - even though the game seems to limit your opportunities at first, you'll get your shot at perfect freedom in no time. If you're going for Achievements, the game willingly hands well over a half of them over on the first playthrough, although they're not quite as easy to get as in Assassin's Creed II. Even though multiplayer is made such a big deal, there aren't that many multiplayer exclusives, which is a good thing.

Control issues, glitches and repetition in certain areas, as well as the lack of dramatic sense summon frustration to the mix, but never manage to ruin what is a great game and a huge improvement over the previous installment in the Assassin's Creed franchise. Assassin's Creed III is a very good game that only gets better towards the end, as you get used to its pace, certain quirks and figure out the secrets of advanced gameplay, obscured by the useless and dumb localization for the longest time in my case.

UPS
+ The game is a true treat to look and listen to
+ The story's back on track
+ Two cities, two hubs and the ocean make up for an immense, immersive world with tons of stuff to do; side missions, collectables, guild challenges, minigames, property upgrades, hunting, you name it
+ The homestead and all that comes with it
+ A good pace and balance
+ Simplified controls, with a minimal amount of sacrifices
+ Improved stealth tactics
+ Combat is ultra-violent, diverse and fun, complete with blood effects/stains à la Dragon Age
+ The naval battles are fun, albeit a bit repetitive
+ Fans will love Desmond's present-day adventures
+ The game just keeps getting better towards the end...

DOWNS
- ...Which also means it's quite a slow hook
- Connor is all right, but he's no Ezio; he, above all, misses out on a lot of emotional cues, making the basically awesome twists feel less awesome
- The menus are confusing
- Deliveries, liberations and several side missions on the frontier are fun, but they tend to repeat themselves; even the naval battles turn out guilty of repetition towards the end
- The localization makes no sense, not as an idea and not in practice
- The controls are still problematic at times
- Rocks on the frontier lack highlighted edges and gaps, you can't always be sure if you can climb 'em or not
- Finally, glitches are bound to be spotted everywhere - from amusing ones to ones that have the potential of ruining your mission

< 8.4 >

torstai 8. marraskuuta 2012

REVIEW - Godzilla 2: War of the Monsters | NES | 1991

GENRE(S): Strategy
RELEASED: February 1991
AVAILABLE ON: NES
DEVELOPER(S): Toho
PUBLISHER(S): Toho

After their first 8-bit Godzilla game turned out a bomb, Toho started working on a game starring Rodan, one of their most popular daikaiju creations besides Godzilla. However, virtually nothing was known about this character outside Japan, so Toho ended up making another Godzilla game instead - one that's completely different from the Godzilla - Monster of Monsters! game, but still called Godzilla 2. Godzilla 2: War of the Monsters, to be exact. And it stinks. From end to end.

There goes Tokyo

Japan is under a large-scale attack by a group of monsters from outer space, spearheaded by the one known as Godzilla. The Self-Defense Forces are on the move against the alien menace.

"Dad! Dad!"
"What is it, son?"
"I found this really cool-looking game! Buy it, pleaaaaaase?!"
"...Are you sure you want *this* game? Remember, you'll only get one game this whole year."
"Yeah, yeah, look! It's got Godzilla on the cover, and he's blowing shit up! It's gonna be an action game for the ages!"
"OK, son..."
"You're the best, dad!"

A couple of hours later:

"I fuckin' hate you, dad."

First things first.
This is just the kind of game that made Nintendo kids hate their parents, as well as their parents' judgement. So, once I heard of a dad who bought Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas to his seven-year old son thinking that it was "a nice little driving game". That's plain stupidity, but in the 8-bit era, parents made errors in judgement because all they had was the vague box art. Nothing to tell them what the game was really about. No disclaimers, no ratings, not much advertising. Just the vague box art of, say, Godzilla looking down at a burning Tokyo, and by the looks of it, smiling. The back cover highlights the action screens, not the screens on which 90% of the game takes place. The summary does tell us what kind of a game it is, but back in '91, this summary might've been a little tough to understand, since there weren't a whole lot of turn-based strategy games on the NES. Why? 'Cause the damn thing was not made for them. So, first of all, Nintendo kids of the past, it was not your dad or mom's fault that you got a bad game in nice and misleading packaging. It was the developers'. Secondly, it was YOU who wanted that particular shitheap of a game due to that nice and misleading packaging. Thirdly, I hope you hung on to this particular shitheap of a game, 'cause it sells for nearly 200 bucks on eBay. If you can't sell it, burn it. Releases some nice colours when scorched, I hear.

The graphics are simply horrible across the board, and it doesn't come as a huge surprise or letdown, but the music is in a sphere of its own when it comes to purely sucking - it could at least suit the atmosphere! Luckily you can turn in-game music off, but that doesn't spare you from the theme song, which is just as badly sequenced as the previous game's basically catchy title tune, but a horrible song as well. It sounds like something from a licensed platformer - hard to imagine a devastating intergalactic war set to this cheery, generic melody.

Gee, thanks Doc! Now tell me: where to get an
A-BOMB? Where to get a trailer? How to "load"
the trailer? Doc? Doc?
Not only is this game ugly, it's plain incomprehensible. So, even while the back cover promises something else - not anything good, though, as it looks just about the weirdest one-on-one fighting game ever, with tanks and monsters getting it on - it's indeed a turn-based strategy game. Turn-based strategy is generally a little bit closer to my heart than real-time strategy, but I don't love it either. If something like this had made its way to my 8-bit box in '91, I would have avoided this genre like the plague, and missed out on masterpieces like Worms due to the description alone.

You have basic military vehicles at your disposal, and many scenarios to choose from. The basic agenda's always the same, though: prevent a huge monster from blowing some waypoint to shit. You'd think I mean Godzilla, but he's just the name to get this shit to sell - he's actually just one of the seven aliens attacking Japan, none more common or strong than the rest of 'em. Everything you do seems a wasted opportunity, and all the scientists meant to help you with "tactical advice" speak common 8-bit gibberish, extremely vague hints, or come out with it honestly: "I can't help you." I like honest people.

I'm not wasting any more time with this fluff. You want to try it, go ahead and make your own judgement. To not beat around the bush any longer or question game developers' "vision", Godzilla 2: War of the Monsters is one of the most terrible wastes of 8-bit cartridge capacity I've ever seen.

UPS
+ The cover art...

DOWNS
- ...And how it betrays
- Looks and sounds exceptionally horrible
- Incomprehensible and tedious gameplay
- Every option besides a straight-on attack is useless - and even that doesn't seem to count for much

< 1.4 > 

...Oh yes, and before I forget. Since I'm moving on and leaving the rest of the Godzilla reviews to a later date, perhaps the next episode of Monster Mash, here's something to end this part of the Godzilla-thon on a positive note. One of the greatest rock classics of all time, "Godzilla" by Blue Öyster Cult - enjoy.


 

keskiviikko 7. marraskuuta 2012

Assassin's Creed III Preview - Read or Die


It's almost time for me to take part in this month's greatest debate, and although it involves a former candidate and eventual pioneer of the presidency of the United States of America, this one has nothing to do with neither Mitt Romney or Barack Obama (congratulations to the latter for proceeding to a second season as the head honcho). This is our world, and here we don't care about real life, much less politics. However, these are some of the main themes of one of the past year's most anticipated video games, which makes them matter. Ladies and gentlemen, about an hour ago I completed Assassin's Creed III, and I am ready to begin work on one gigantic review. Usually I write the review on the go in tandem with the game, but this time, I was so focused and so eager to see Desmond Miles' story come to its conclusion that I had no time for that. Besides, me and my girlfriend were on a 72-hour road trip in the middle of my campaign, which prevented me from playing the game, and the withdrawal made me even more hell bent on just finishing the game and worrying about the review later. I know writing this review will take me a lot of time, there will be tons of subjects to discuss - I considered doing an episodic review to ease it up a little, but digressed - so I decided to do a big-ass preview to fire things up, and perhaps make time for some actual reviewing instead of excessive storytelling when I do get to the review.

THE STORY SO FAR

Altaïr Ibn-La'Ahad as he appears in
Assassin's Creed (2007)
The Assassin's Creed saga tells one of the most complicated stories ever, and it would take me a week to lay it all down, but here are the basics to remind long-time fans where we're at, approximately, and inform series newbies what the fuss is all about. Desmond Miles, a New York bartender, is kidnapped by a company named Abstergo. Abstergo is a shadow corporation working behind the guise of a pharmaceutical company (Umbrella Inc., anyone?), founded by who used to be known as the Knights Templar, and dedicated to carry out the mission of their ancestors: to assume control of all civilization. Desmond is a direct descendant of the Assassins, the Templars' sworn enemy, and although he's never worked as one and has no combat experience, Abstergo can use the genetic memories stored in his DNA to virtually recreate historical events with the help of a device known as the Animus. So, Abstergo straps Desmond into the Animus, in which he relives the memories of Altaïr Ibn-La'Ahad, a legendary Assassin who lived in Israel in the times of the Third Crusade. Altaïr betrayed the Assassin's Creed and as a punishment, as well as a re-evaluation of his skills, he was given a list of nine names to check, in other words, kill a bunch of guys in the Templar service - men searching for the Apple of Eden, an artifact which could be used for mind control, and which they believed could bring them victory in the quest for world domination. After killing the last of the era's most distinguished Templars, Robert de Sable, Altaïr found that there was a tenth Templar involved - his very own mentor, Al Mualim. Altaïr returned to his home and killed the spiritual leader of the Assassins, gaining possession of the Apple of Eden. After nailing this memory from Desmond's DNA strain, Abstergo proceeded to make plans for his execution. While waiting to take the trip to the gallows, Desmond realized that through the Animus, he had inherited Altaïr's curious talent to see anomalies invisible to the naked eye. The game ended in a cliffhanger for the ages, as Desmond looked up on the wall of his cell and saw a cryptic message written in blood, by Desmond's predecessor as Abstergo's guinea pig - the mysterious Subject 16.

Ezio Auditore da Firenze
as he appears in Assassin's
Creed II
(2009)
In the beginning of Assassin's Creed II, Desmond is still dumbfounded by his new skill as well as the message; who was Subject 16? What happened to him? He has no time to even try to figure it out, as Lucy, one of his captors, indeed turns out to be on his side (after a few well-placed hints in the first game) and encourages him to join her in a hasty escape from the Abstergo HQ. Lucy takes Desmond to Shaun Hastings and Rebecca Crane, two modern-day Assassins who choose to make technological efforts for the cause over climbing rooftops and killing people. In other words, geeks. But formidable geeks, as Shaun is an incredible analyst behind the enfuriatingly sarcastic and self-absorbed shell of his, and Rebecca is a specialist on Animus technology. What the Assassins want Desmond to do is to enter an Animus of their own creation and relive the memories of Ezio Auditore da Firenze, perhaps the most influential Assassin in history, who lived in Renaissance Italy - to figure out the current location of the Apple of Eden, but also to train Desmond. The "Bleeding Effect", which granted Desmond his Eagle Vision, can be harnessed to teach Desmond a whole lifetime's variety of skills in a few days. Ezio is a delivery boy, working for his father, who is a banker, but moonlights as an Assassin. When he's on the threshold of revealing a devastating Templar conspiracy, he is taken to the gallows along with Ezio's two brothers. Ezio spends the next two decades hunting down the men responsible for the tragedy and training to be an Assassin under the watchful eye of his uncle Mario. When Ezio finally reaches the head of the Templars, Rodrigo Borgia - a.k.a. Pope Alexander VI - he comes to the conclusion that his death would change nothing, so he lets him live and enters the Vault, which the Templars desperately seek. Within, he sees a vision of an entity of the First Civilization, who tells Ezio he is but a conduit, and proceeds to talk directly to Desmond, who is revealed to be the one destined to save the world. Once again, before Desmond can even properly react to the holographic figure's cryptic claims, he is brought out of the Animus and taken for a ride to another safehouse - Abstergo's found 'em. Subject 16's fate still remains unknown, but it's clear the man went insane, and it has something to do with the Bleeding Effect.

Ezio Auditore da Firenze as he appears
in Assassin's Creed: Brotherhood (2010)
The Bleeding Effect's advantages indeed come with a high price. Upon reaching a safehouse in Italy - which happens to be Ezio's old villa, of all places - Desmond begins to have visions of the past, visions so vivid he's actually suffering from an identity crisis between himself, Ezio and Altaïr. Mostly Ezio, since he's relived his past all the way from his birth. The Apple of Eden's current location still remains a mystery, so even while Desmond is clearly not OK, the Assassins ask him to return to Ezio's later years, and Desmond obides, seeing that he has no other choice if he wants to make things right. After Ezio's return from the Vatican, a full-scale attack shakes the foundations of Monteriggioni, ordered by the Pope's son Cesare Borgia. While Ezio manages to get his mother and sister to safety, his uncle Mario is executed, the Apple of Eden is stolen, and Ezio himself suffers near-lethal wounds. He somehow manages to travel to Rome to reunite with the remaining members of the Brotherhood, and begin plotting on how to overthrow the Pope and his family before putting an end to their lives, one by one, and regaining the Apple of Eden. Ezio's mission is a perfect success, and he places the Apple of Eden in a safe vault under the Colosseum. Upon pinpointing this location, the modern-day Assassins travel to Rome. At the altar where Ezio placed the Apple, time stops, and Minerva, another entity of the First Civilization, forces Desmond to stab Lucy to death - what's unknown at this point is that she senses Lucy is working for the Templars after all. Desmond collapses on the floor and falls into a coma. An unknown party advises Shaun and Rebecca to plug him into the Animus, even if the machine's ill effects are the causes of Desmond's behaviour and his current comatose state.

Desmond Miles as he appears in
Assassin's Creed: Revelations (2011)
Desmond - or rather a form taken by his consciousness - wakes up in the Black Room, the very core of the Animus' programming, where he finally meets what remains of Subject 16, a.k.a. Clay Kaczmarek. He, too, ended up like Desmond, all confused of who and what he is, the main difference being that his body died, and all that remained was a digital memory of him, an A.I.. Clay's expertise with the Animus helps him save Desmond's data from deletion, and guide him back to the land of the living. What Desmond needs to do is to achieve a Synch Nexus, which can be done if he relives both of Ezio and Altaïr's memories up to the point both of the ancestors have nothing left for Desmond to relive. As Desmond's good luck would have it, in his mid-50's, Ezio, now the grand master and mentor of the Assassins, travelled to Constantinople to seek the true purpose of his order, by learning more of Altaïr and his efforts against the Templars. Altaïr used keystones to preserve his memories (yeah, it's kind of like very early Animus technology), which Ezio is primarily out to find. Ezio finally finds Altaïr's final resting place and gazing at his corpse, he realizes his time as an Assassin has come to an end. He speaks directly to Desmond - although he does not know who he is, exactly - hoping to have fulfilled the expectations of the First Civilization, and gracefully retires with the love of his life, Sofia, by his side. After reliving the careers of two of his finest ancestors, and making his way through a labyrinth of code which represents his own life up 'til this point, Desmond is ready to leave the Animus just as it starts deletion as a safety measure. Clay sacrifices his digital remains to help Desmond out of the Black Room. Desmond wakes up from his coma with Shaun and Rebecca on his side, and a third party - his father, William Miles. William opens the doors of the van they're in, revealing a forest on their home soil of the United States of America. The Assassins' search for the Grand Temple of the First Civilization begins.

GETTING THE GAME

Ratonhnhaké:ton, a.k.a. Connor
Kenway, as he appears in Assassin's
Creed III
(2012)
Not something I had planned. I was very disappointed how Assassin's Creed: Revelations turned out. The game staggered in every possible way; the story wasn't that good and the storyline of the franchise ran in circles. Yeah, sure, some stuff was added in but none of that functioned too well. The would-be devastating turns and twists looked like stock, thrown in just for the sake of further weirdness. The thing about weirdness is that there's a line between weird and plain incomprehensible, and plain incomprehensible has the potential of turning utterly uninteresting if it's taken too far. I feared Assassin's Creed III would continue on this track. Luckily - I can say this much - it explained most of the weirdest stuff, and concluded it with some dignity. I got Assassin's Creed III for many reasons. One: even if Desmond's story took some amazingly ridiculous twists in the last game, it's still the same story I dug to the nine planes of hell for the duration of the first three games. It was the main reason for me to return to the series after being so disappointed with the first game, and I'm glad I did, 'cause Assassin's Creed II turned out a damn masterpiece altogether. Assassin's Creed: Brotherhood was a hoot, and when Desmond killed Lucy in the end, I seriously might've dropped the controller on the floor so hard and heavy it no longer works, along with my jaw. Two: Ubisoft's made it clear from the announcement of Brotherhood that an Assassin's Creed III is in the works, and it's not Brotherhood. Ultimately, Assassin's Creed II, Brotherhood and the stale Revelations were to bind together as the Renaissance trilogy, kind of like Grand Theft Auto III, Vice City and San Andreas made up for the GTA III trilogy. They were to be followed by Grand Theft Auto IV, a wholly redesigned, next-generation game, as the Renaissance trilogy was to be followed by Assassin's Creed III, a redesigned game with a whole new engine and a new backdrop - the American Revolution. So, if they finally had the balls to ditch the Anvil engine and upgrade it to AnvilNext, and the audacity to positively claim they were going to top what Assassin's Creed II originally was, then hell yes, I wanted the first-hand scoop. Three: the American Revolution. The writers of Assassin's Creed have proven to retell history with a group of steady hands in the past, I couldn't wait to see what they had in mind for the most important series of events in American history, including the Declaration of Independence. Four: it would be damn interesting to see a Native American protagonist, and what he can accomplish wearing the garments of the Brotherhood.

I originally played and completed the first four games on the PlayStation 3, and I had them borrowed from a friend. After Assassin's Creed II, I was convinced I'd buy all of the games, but for the Xbox 360, 'cause I wanted to have some good reason to replay the first game. The Xbox 360 version has Achievements while the PlayStation 3 version never got its Trophy patch. Well, buying the games proved to be a difficult task. I didn't want to spend my money on games I had already beaten, I wanted to have new experiences instead. In time, the first three games became cheap enough to buy at once, so I did it, refusing to buy Revelations. The GameStop clerk serving encouraged me to pre-order Assassin's Creed III, so I did it. Of course, he also tried to convince me to buy Revelations. Didn't work - but after beating the first three games, I marched back to the store and bought the damn game, 'cause it would be wrong to leave it out of the equation. Sucky or not, it was still part of the story which was to continue in Assassin's Creed III. At that same time, I double-checked on my pre-order details. I had a "Collector's Edition" pre-ordered, but I checked up the actual Special Edition on the net and the high price of my pre-ordered item didn't make any sense. All the Special Edition had was exclusive packaging and one lousy bonus mission. A ten more for this than for the standard edition of the game? No fuckin' deal!

Well, for the first time ever (seriously), a game I had pre-ordered was scheduled for a midnight launch at my local store, so last Tuesday, I was seriously near pissing my pants out of excitement, but still kind of bummed of the mere thought of having a crappy "Special Edition" of the game. Well, at about 7:30 P.M., a news bulletin on Facebook graciously told me that all pre-orders could already be collected in cities where the local GameStops were open. I had 30 minutes, so I ignited like a space rocket and placed my receipt on the desk, and stood in awe as the clerk handed me the Join or Die Edition of the game.

This edition comes in a fancy slipcase that has the image above embossed on it. Inside the slipcase, is a box with the exact same image, and inside that box, goodies are found. There's a DLC coupon for the minor stuff exclusive to this edition - the single-player mission Ghost of War and the multiplayer package The Sharpshooter. There's a cast iron "Join or Die" medallion with the Assassins' insignia on it, as well as a leather bag to store it in. Finally, George Washington's diary, complete with a fancy bookmark. Under all of this, there's the game, in standard packaging for those who want to store the fancier packaging somewhere special - or sell it on eBay, as I've seen people do. Was seeing this shiny box round out the Assassin's Creed collection on my shelf worth my money? Indeed. Was the game itself worth my money? That, is what I will tell you all about in just a matter of days.

WHAT THE CRITICS SAY

Most of it's surprisingly to the point - or rather, I see their points, but do not agree on how all of them affect the whole experience, in better or worse. Although I'm damn near of frankly loathing IGN nowadays, they're still usually the first to write full-length reviews, and they hit most of the most important points, so I turned to them for the first review I actually read from the beginning to the end. 8.5 was a very predictable rating from IGN - they give it to just about every hyped game they really don't know how to rate. I'm not saying it was a bad rating for this particular game, but it made for a less trustworthy IGN review. There were some good comments there, ones that mattered to me and on things I paid a lot of attention to while playing, ones that I will certainly take into reflection in my review.

There was one user review on Metacritic which really tempered me up - clearly this guy had never played even one Assassin's Creed game prior, and he dared to write a review of this game. He completely bashed it with a 0 (bringing the average down by a very disrespective notch), said it was a boring game with a shitty story, full of set pieces and glitches. The glitches I can vouch for (totally.), but boring game with a shitty story? FULL of set pieces? Maybe this guy played Revelations and got confused. Or maybe he's just a fuckin' retard. The point is, don't judge Assassin's Creed III by what you've read. It's one of those games you've got to play yourself - one that some people will like, and some won't, and some will go to instant extremes like that guy if something about the game's not to his liking. Did I like the game? Did I not? Once again, this secret remains under wraps. Don't go thinking I went to the trouble of writing this huge preview due to the game itself - I did it out of respect for the franchise. That should stir you up ;)

WHEN DOES THE REVOLUTION BEGIN?

Revolution begins as soon as I have finished up work on the much delayed review of the second Godzilla game on the NES. That review should be done by tomorrow evening. I have my hands full with work 'til Sunday (got to catch up on the hours), but I promise the review will be online before the end of next week. 'Til then, keep playing Assassin's Creed III - I hope you're enjoying it.

Like all great Assassins, I wasn't working
alone.